feels like acceptance

2 min


Hey there,

You…

You know

who

wanted to connect

personally, direct

one to another, brothers and sisters in arms,

suffering through lives with absent charms

I see You struggling

finding it troubling

when the wind isn’t blowing Your way

when problems suffocate come what may

sins of the past, the bed You made

are constantly consistently replayed,

when Your time in life feels overstayed

when pain beautifully, bitterly cascades

inches away from that noose trajectory

or pill-induced that comatose reverie

mere minutes from triggering

a pointless, tragic disfiguring

I want You to know, You’re…You’re not alone

could tell You to listen to the soothing tone

of my voice or tell You to breathe deeply, but

face it, sometimes that just won’t make the cut

some days are too heavy and beaten, You just need sleep

some days the mountains You face are just too damn steep

some days You have it, some You don’t

some You’ll feel it, some You won’t

don’t worry about breathing deeply, or calming down

no need to take Your shoes off, connect to the ground

instead

do the opposite

even if

You have to sit

take a

pew, have a rest

whatever

You think is best

so

You are comfortable

comfortable and able

Now…

I want You to scream at the world for the heaviness, all of the burden

or laugh like a mad person, at nothing, from nothing, all of a sudden

swear, cast aspersions on those who wronged You, don’t You hold back

launch Your one-person assault with a deadly tongue, a verbal attack

do You have a piece of crockery, plate, glass or something You can afford to lose?

I want You to find a safe space, maybe in the garden and smash whatever You choose

take that glass, take that bottle, take that plate and just smash it to smithereens

some days there is no happy horizon or deep well…some days there’s just in-betweens

why not film it and rate the different explosive, savage breakages? just for the sheer what the hell

we have opportunities, moments of freedom to make memories golden, before that toll of our death bell

TikTok it, Facebook it, WhatsApp and X it, make a pretty Insta of all the pretty destruction

leave Your friends, family and followers guessing, give them no reason, rhyme or introduction

light a match, let it burn to the bottom

light a match, let it burn colours autumn

take the heady scent of burnt wood, paper and clothing

into Your lungs, watch fire’s dance free from loathing

lick a blade, but just don’t bite it

revel in the misery, just sit in it

momentary bliss, clarity coupled with momentary sadness, disarray and more

periods that make us smile, laugh and soar, times that rock us to our core

let loose, footloose,

leave that DIY noose

forget those pills

gun or hand drills

don’t need to deal

don’t need to feel

not today

right away

don’t need to end it all

or get up after You fall

not today

right away

do what feels…right

even if it�s not right

do what feels like acceptance

free from external expectance

*

Thanks for reading!

Author’s Notes: Even though I have a pile of unfinished/maybe finished WIPs…this came out of me and I felt it was important to go to the front of the publishing queue.

If You are struggling…this is for You. If You’re not…this is also for You. It is for me, it is for us.


Paul Stewart

3 Comments

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  1. Beautiful message and I loved the allusions too social media – it really is all just so toxic and false. Feeling the misery is sometimes, I think the only way to move forward.

  2. thank you for speaking your truth here, agreed with Celia and Rock, sometimes the only way out is through (which is an aphorism that I dislike, but in a lot of cases it’s true)